Untitled
Chapter 12 Another face (2) of the love
11:09 PM, Wednesday, November 5, 2008
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Chapter 12 Another face (2) of the love Eric is looking at me silently, send you to come back so late, will cause and misunderstand?
The little soldier is my boyfriend, as everyone knows.
I smile, thank you.
Eric draws back the door for me. The left hand takes away the paper scrap that I am stained with on the hair, have a rest early, more arduous recently, you are thin.
I move first, I dodge in a hurry, small soldier standing in but it is dark to knock.
How are you here? Did not go to work? My hurry and confusion without rhyme or reason.
What? May not I be here? Tone is ice-cold.
Small soldier is not that what you saw is such.
Do you worry and explain what it is? Do I have and talk about you?
I
Why not answer my telephone?
I I Have not heard. I take out the telephone, 9 have not been connected.
Little soldier, place that has a meal is noisy too, I have not heard, see the small soldier's sight ruthlessly, I am a little timid and timid. He is our boss, the company has a dinner party in the evening, he sends us to come back.
Send you to come back? Does it have you only alone on the car why to give to you back? Why get off here? What are you hiding from? Are you afraid what it is?
I need only you and believe me, it is not you that think as like that as what was hit.
What kind do I hit imagination? Small soldier roars towards me for the first time.
He catches my arms, walk to the family with vigorous strides, I trot all the way, arms ache very much, ache in the heart even more.
Entering the door, I am silly there, the fragmentary candle light in the room, there are my favourite dishes on the desk, there is lollipop. I have forgotten, it is our the first anniversary commemoration day in love today.
Small soldier walk out on me get sofa, sweep dish of desk to the ground like go mad. I begin to shed tears, shed tears ceaselessly, but can't explain.
Have slept on the sofa crying. Small soldier emit blood silk eyes of flame, little soldier tone unbelievably, hand like the little soldier pliers, do not hover in my dream.
Originally, was my gentle small soldier also having violent side at heart, my understanding like my imagination really to him? But I know, I love him, in any case.
At midnight, the little soldier embraces me on the bed. He holds me, I feel his tremble, I hear him say to me annoyedly, the ice is blue, I am sorry, I am sorry, you do not know how I love you, I am very afraid, are very afraid of losing you.
I put and make falling asleep, but the tears have flowed disappointingly.
The small soldier begins to be terribly suspicious to be swayed by considerations of gain or loss. He always woke up suddenly at midnight, embraced me tightly, the embrace letting people suffocate, say ceaselessly, the ice is blue, I love you, I love you.
The small soldier's music room is more difficult to do, he no longer goes to the bar to play too, accompany me after coming off duty every day, make the thing that I like eating, boil dense black coffee, smoke, make love in the fragrance of coffee. Our languages are fewer and fewer, I begin to often stare flankly, the small soldier looks at me with the innocent childish expression in one's eyes, the ice is blue, are you thinking what it is?
Thinking of nothing, I was staring flankly.
Why do I think you farther and farther from me?
How can. I am comforting the young soldier's head, the more he looks like a child without sense of safety more and more.
The ice is blue, let's get married.
I shake in mind. If several months ago, I will assent joyfully, but now, I have a few worried doubts, I begin to think that does not understand small soldier by oneself, just as his feeling, I also think him farther and farther from me, but I love him, this is enough, the one left is time.
Wait a moment again, Let's put aside it till after we are steady, OK?
The little soldier is looking at me, I found out the tear in his eyes unexpectedly.
The ice is blue, can't I give you a feeling of a steady family? I oneself, sense of duty to the family too too.
I have not spoken, perhaps, in the face of the marriage, people make reality unconsciously. I want to have a smooth family, have a steady lover.
Don't worry, I will be diligent.
Small soldier cut, go top of the head yellow to take place, short and black short crop, business wear, he change into for one staff member of securities broker company, in order to give to a stable family of my, he gives up one's own dream. The existence was given up and devoted in the love, perhaps such love has been already unequal.
I begin to learn to cook, boil black coffee, wait for the small soldier to go home. The small soldier's words are fewer and fewer, I think him unhappy.
We are originally persons swelling oneself, for giving up the orbit of one's own life each other, more and more tired, the more deviate from more and more, overbalance more and more.
Eric is not still too far to keep in touch near with me, keep an appropriate distance, have not oppressed the sense, is never far away from too, is observing every gesture of me. What man having a sure thing such a calm one is make.
Bai Wei says, the ice is blue, I think you and Eric should be heavenly couples, he can meet your small Vanity and pursuing to idealized life, no need the rice and fuel daily necessaries all day.
My white Wei is one. How many advantages he has given to you to act as the lobbist.
Oh, I may not necessarily be bribed, just think so so good as to offer to missing being really regrettable for my advantage, it's a great pity whom others courted is not I, it's a pity too you have been covered with lard in the eyes, know you how long does it play with with dissolute singer of you, the youth is bitter and short really.
Bai Wei, why do you change?
She smiles despising at me, only the little girl believes the love, do you say that the half-length animal is believable to down? You just do your love fond dream. It would be better, catch reality is famous to want, as early as possible, make money, want, as early as possible, fall in love, take as early as possible too early, it should be certainly better for a long time even more that sober.
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