Untitled
Chapter eight Gray past event (5)
11:05 PM, Wednesday, November 5, 2008
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Chapter eight Gray past event (5) Then two people smile and roll, dilute the bottom of heart thinly and sentimentally. So dim sincerity.
My father comes back more and more hardworkingly, while coming back, begin to have smiles on the auntie's face, have more tender feeling in my father's eyes too. I think, in so many years, perhaps the auntie begins to fall in love with father, I know, my father must love her, otherwise, he will not choose to get married.
Sometimes, I will talk about my innermost thoughts and feelings to the auntie, talk about the long-haired pelt that Bei Bei and I like. Sometimes the auntie has no expression, sometimes see me laughing warmly. She begins drawing again, draws the golden woods, draw on blue day.
I am ill that there is once, at midnight, the auntie is giving me a piggyback to go to the hospital, sombre winter, having walked well far distance, she is still cold, do not have smile, her worry that but can find out, she is only a person who is not good at expressing.
And, I am hit by car, just some leather traumatism, the auntie learns news darts, rush into the ward very eagerly, see I am free, eyes have been turned into the cold hole. She only has too many worries, there is too much and lonely she.
I begin to hope the auntie is really my mother.
That is that one float in the early autumn of drizzle, one day in a season that I like, it is the life of holding wedding of the uncle too, the prodigal on uncle's love had one day getting into the frame of mind for work too at last, have handed over oneself to a woman with all one's heart.
That day, the auntie dressed up very beautifully, attacked black a bunch of height skirt and bright pink scarf.
My father says whether you can change a suit of clothes, don't wear black.
The auntie hangs the high eyebrow, want me to wear red?
There is a burst of faint the smell of gunpowder in the room.
We don't go.
Why? The wedding of your elder brother, how could we go?
The auntie is holding father's arms, enter superciliously, her neck is very long, look from side, there are beautiful and bright and clean arcs, is lining with the long tassel earrings, never look like the woman 40 years old. She has eyes beautiful like mothers, a wave is circulated. Her back is very straight, flicker and grow the appearance on foot. Yes, such a woman, certainly will vie for trying the trend of events best, though the bride is younger by ten many years olds than she.
Bride smiling happily at station by the uncle's body, the cheongsam of the red brocade, it is the simple beauty.
It see it is leisurely to auntie,uncle a little the distracted, then smile of job emerged, exchange a few words of greetings with father. And the auntie, look at uncles definitely, the uncle looks at and disappears. I have understood age of the emotion for the first time already, the complicated content in auntie's eyes, I have already guessed seven or eight fen, originally, this woman had loving the uncle deeply all the time. But slowly, having resumed being ice-cold in her eyes, it is ice-cold to the bone, have, perhaps, there is hatred.
This will bury very deep woman, will marry the loved man's younger brother by oneself, in loving the man's wedding newly, a rose bleeding stands. Father is looking at the auntie, has not spoken, just have her gently, he loves dearly and has pity for her. I begin, sympathize with she, begin, sympathize with father too, what kind of things is love on earth, torment so.
Because of wedding of uncle, grandmother has not raise difficult questions, look auntie in the eye never also, I did not know the whole story among them, just suddenly thought that felt sad. My father is between two women that love deeply, seven years in a dilemma. Among them, still lie across an enormous shade.
The auntie has drunk much wine, my father has drunk a lot too. Quietly, have one's own anxiety each, drink stuffy wine, in here being enormous to seem extremely lonely in being lively.
After going home, the auntie begins to shed tears, my father's red eyes involve in her the room rudely, I have never seen father is so, the beast as injured as the head. The sound of quarrelling over has spread in the room, then scream and wheeze.
I contract in the corner, begin to shiver, cry. They are all drunk, drunk.
I take out mother's photo, she is facing toward me and smile, I am facing toward her and cry.
Day resumed calm again, it seemed that the auntie suddenly changed a person, she began to care about us, she does the food that father likes eating, she buys the beautiful clothes for me, even begin to knit sweaters for us. A kind of happy feeling washes father and me to let faint within short time, so untrue. And all these, have happened truly again. Our true beginning life as general as whole family. Father does business with the uncle outside, the business is greater and greater, socialize between customer's government and bank every day, our life is more and more superior, my father often opens car-mountedly we go for a drive, my father fishes, I run on the meadow desperately, the auntie paints there silently, we are in her picture. My father is more and more reluctant to be away from home, so long as free, he will come back home. And I, always think such happiness is too untrue, I often smile at to wake up the dream, then nip oneself exerting all one's effort, am not I dreaming again?
Bei Bei was said, the ice is blue, a woman could change a family originally, and the family can really change a person's personality, you are much more optimistic.
Bei Bei say I begin to like you for your house, woman.
The day beautiful passes for two years like this, this is my most beautiful day in juvenile years, all of us do not know, contain the enormous murderous intention in day beautiful like this.
A project of theirs of my father is compelled to stop the horse, in addition, is in arrears with fund and chain debts, on capital turnover, he and uncle make a short-term loan on among the banks everywhere, will watch and will be forced in the blind alley soon, need 50 million, or the project is made an exception, possible to vitalize, but a bank is not willing no loan. On one hand the uncle begins to folk fund-raising with an unwarranted name, enterprises have been actually already in imminent danger that the ones that looked strong were taken care of, but taking care of in the other human eye is still a only fresh shelf. The uncle promises to pay the interest for the interest higher than the fivefold of bank, only people know inside information, this sum of money, in fact just stop up loophole in order to return the loan. On the other hand, they begin to work everywhere, hope to be specially pardonned, the uncle finds the person in charge, a big covert payment, it is really eternal famous saying that money makes the mare go, the project of the past half years for death gave the green light at last.
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